Godfather Breaks Face

Chicago Ranger and Godfather of Loyola Baseball Kevin Casey recently broke his face playing intramural (probably co-ed) football. Experts agree that the hit put on Casey was probably the closest thing to real football that the University of Notre Dame has seen all season.

The former co-holder of the "Best Hair in 8th Grade" maintains that his hair was unscathed in the accident.

Casey has been listed as doubtful for the game this weekend against perennial intramural powerhouse "St. Martha All Girls Dorm Floor 7".

A Salvagable Effort

Although we did not meet our lofty, and most important team goal of drinking 350 pitchers of Jesus Juice, all was not lost this record breaking season. There are some things that we can salvage as we move forward towards next season. River was spotted on the drinking scene so often this year, we ALMOST forgot how much of a pussy he really is, and how small of a contribution he makes to the Rangers legendary drinking prowess. Secondly, due to the extreme intoxication that took place, several new Ranger "Secret" handshakes were invented, along with a laundry list of timeless quotes. We've had our ups and downs, 3 pitchers all the way to 30. We've seen men falling off bar stools and dancing to "Sunshine, Lollipops and Rainbows" like a bunch of teenage girls at a Justin Timberlake concert. We have shared in the glory of a demolished bathroom door and lived to tell the tale, all while Lucas danced around us half nude. Maybe next year he'll grow the huevos to bear it all. And who can forget the establishment of The Chuck Norris Choke Hold! Many a Ranger has fallen to its might. Here's to you Chuck, for making the life of a drunken Ranger that much more dangerous!

Jersey Buyback

If you know that you are not playing next season and would like to sell your jersey back, please let me know.

Da Beers!

The final 2007 beer count is in!

In 2007, The Chicago Rangers sucked down 315 pitchers of beer and contributed $4,376.78 to the local GDP.

The Breakdown:

Gio's: 252 pitchers - $3,015.24
Hooters: 47 pitchers - $1,193.29
The Rail: 11 pitchers - $135.75
Michigan Inn: 5 pitchers - $32.50

Due to Ranger drunkenness and frequent blackouts, several receipts are still MIA.

Da Bears!

Im sure you guys already know, the Bears will be starting there Super Bowl run in San Diego on Sep. 9th. I want to invite all the Rangers (and wives) to my place. I'll have burgers and brats. If you want to bring anything special to cook or drink please do. Game time is 3:15 but feel free to stop in anytime after 1:00. If interested or need directions here is my e-mail izz5@myway.com

Soldier Field Tailgate for the Hawkeys

Hello all, and I am sorry that I was unable to be there yesterday, but I feel fortunate to have been a part of Ranger history and enjoyed my season with you guys! Even though I was not included on the Rookie email shout, I still am glad to have shared the field of battle with you, my brothers. I am working out my future contract with GM Lucas, and hopefully will come to terms on a long term deal.

As far as this weekend goes, if you dont have a place to be Saturday, I am hosting a tailgate at Soldier Field for the Hawkeye vs NIU game and would love to see you there for refreshment, food and lovely sporty ladies ready for Hot Rangers action. For you that are married, you can enjoy the view. RSVP to my email for details on the festivities, adamkubey@yahoo.com, or always join the facebook Rangers page!
QB

Congrats on a Great Season!

While it is dissapointed that we did not overtake the Marlins, it was still a historic season for the Chicago Rangers! I wouyld like to thank everyone for making it one of the most enjoyable seasons to watch and keep book of. Special thanks go to Tim, who guided us to a franchise best record of 23 and 4 in the regular season, Luke, who was a mastermind at GM and a wizard on the grounds Crew, and to everyone else who supported the team.

Thank you to all of our "rookies" this year who contibuted so much, Alonzo, Tony, Jody, and Big Jon all who could have been team MVP's. And who can forget my little brother, Dr. Nick Monroe, who provided the feistyness and youthful exuberance when we needed it.

We will be back next year, with the hunger for that CMBA Championship, and make next year even better than this year!